Spend a day on BART

No, I'm not kidding.

Why not ride the entirety of the public transit system that was named the #1 transit system in America--in the ">30 million annual passenger trips" category--by the prestigious American Public Transportation Association?

Weekend or weekday, you're bound to find something interesting on BART. Take a book, a pad of paper and a pen, your thoughts, some light refreshments and a switchblade to deter the crazies and get on at the station of your choice.

Never seen Fremont? Always wondered what Concord looked like? Colma? For the low price of $4.65 you've got three (or more--ask your station agent) hours to tour all 104 miles that BART has to offer--without exiting any stations--before returning to the station where your adventure began.


For a fascinatingly detailed look at the history of BART, go here. For those wanting more dates and less narrative, here is a 74-page chronology of the birth of BART. And here is information relating to everything bike on the BART system, just in case you can't stifle that urge to get off and see all that Dublin has to offer.

Visit the Marin Headlands

The Headlands are the brown/green hills you can see--when there isn't fog, at least--directly across the Golden Gate Bridge. The road that snakes up to the top of Hawk Hill "affords spectacular views of San Francisco" and is a part of the popular "Headlands Loop" bike ride that many cyclists make a part of their training regimen. (For those who don't know, this is easily doable after work during the summer months.)

It is likely that you visited the Headlands if you came to San Francisco as a tourist before moving here. Ditto if you've lived in the city for a while, have a bicycle or access to some kind of personal motorized transport and have entertained out-of-town visitors. But if you're like my friend who recently left San Francisco after living in the Bay Area for six years and had never been to the Headlands and didn't have a car...take the bus--see below.

Lots of good stuff to do/see here. There's Point Bonita Lighthouse, a Nike missile silo, a beach, a lagoon, a hostel, lots of hiking and mountain biking trails and a nice place to view the sunset (when there isn't fog).


The 76 Marin Headlands runs only on Sundays and holidays. Here is a schedule and a route map.

Check out the Richard Serra sculpture at UCSF Mission Bay

For those that don't know who Richard Serra is, here is a bit of a primer.

My quick synopsis, though, is that he's an artist who is best known for making these mammoth metal sculptures that are usually intended for some specific outdoor site. Eli Broad, some really rich dude who really loves LA, likes his work, as does whoever organized the retrospective currently going on at MOMA in New York.

In the case of UCSF Mission Bay, you've got two 50-foot-tall, 80-ton slabs of steel facing each other in the middle of a dirt courtyard and tilting slightly in opposite directions.

(un-justice-doing picture)

Beyond the easternmost slab is Third Street, China Basin and the East Bay. Benches are conveniently placed for enjoying a tall boy of Tecate while watching the setting sun inflame these rust-colored hulks.

Also, be sure to check out the chain netting partially enshrouding one of the parking garages on the campus--specifically, how it can also appear to be a solid indigo-colored panel, depending on where you're standing. It's hard to describe, but is cool in person.


UCSF Mission Bay is located at the corner of Third Street and 16th, and is accessible by, among other things, bicycle and the T Third Street. The sculpture in question is visible from Third Street and is located in a plaza, evidently called Gene Friend Way, located between Third and Fourth. The plaza and the parking garage--the latter labeled Community Center Garage--are on this map. Here is an article about the rather difficult installation of the piece.

Go to Trannyshack

"You live in San Francisco and you haven't been to a drag show?!?! For shame!"

If you're seeking to avoid admonishments like this, then take action tonight by heading to Trannyshack--the weekly drag show with its own Wikipedia entry--at The Stud. It's been happening every Tuesday night for about the last 10 years.

A few hints if this is your first time going:

1. Don't wear too many clothes. It's usually pretty crowded and so can get hot as fuck. No need to rile up a bunch of sweating homos by dragging your bulky North Face down jacket across the tops of their heads while squeezing your way to the front.

2. Drink before you come. However suggestive that recommendation may sound, it actually pertains to the crowded conditions referenced in #1. Unless you like trying out different facial expressions--sexy, desperate, pissed-off--just to get a bartender to notice you over the 54 other patrons with similarly receding buzzes, pound a few beers on the way. Or, if your personal views do not condone consumption while on public property, order drinks two at a time once you get to the bar.

3. Don't stand too close to the stage. Things sometimes can get messy.


The Stud is a bar at 9th and Harrison that homosexuals are known to frequent but whose clientele is not exclusively such. Cover for Trannyshack is $8. A tip for the large drag queen collecting entry fees, though plainly "encouraged", is not required. (Did I mention that one Tuesday I saw Bjork exit the bar and chase a passing garbage truck around the corner onto 9th? This was the week that Matthew Barney's exhibition opened at SFMOMA. Bjork arrived at Trannyshack with a small marching band. I have no idea about the garbage truck.)

Admire the view from the top of the Mandarin Oriental Hotel

This is a pretty spectacular, if under-appreciated, view. From the vantage point of a glass "skyway" 48 stories above the street, you'll find clear lines of sight due south--the South Bay, the Mission and Daly City--and, even better, north--the Golden Gate, Alcatraz, Angel's Island, Marin and beyond. Maybe the best part about the whole deal, however, is the sense of scale you get of the Transamerica Pyramid and how it towers over most everything around it.

But this view doesn't come easily. Where you're going isn't public space, meaning that you've got to evade a couple lines of people who are paid, in part, to keep people like you out. You've basically got two options here: pay whatever exorbitant price they charge to stay the night or pretend that you paid whatever exorbitant price they charge to stay the night.

(Additional options do exist. For example, somehow obtain a uniform and impersonate an employee of the hotel, actually get a job there, falsify the necessary credentials and permits and then visit the hotel in the guise of a building inspector, etc.)

But assuming that you usually favor the cheapest and least-complicated options in life, put on your sternest businesswoman's face and your most sensible pair of pumps and just stride through the smallish lobby to the bank of elevators in back, ignoring any welcoming comments directed at you. Go to the elevator and take it all the way to the top. Once there, head towards the the glass-walled section of hallway, taking care to avoid making any suspicious and/or obviously déclassé moves that might alert someone to the fact that you don't belong.


The Mandarin Oriental Hotel, also known as 345 California Center, is located at 222 Sansome Street. It is notable for a number of reasons: 1) It is the third-tallest building in San Francisco; 2) It is the tallest mid-block building in San Francisco; 3) It is perhaps the only distinctly Chinese-looking tall building in the San Francisco skyline--my opinion. (For a while I thought that it bore a subtle resemblance to the Bank of China tower in Hong Kong--maybe it's the antennae--but I'm not so sure anymore.)